Update

A few things have happened since the last update so I'll let yall in on what's current.

1. On Monday the 21st we received the papers we'd been waiting on so we could apply for our visas. So that afternoon we went to the city to spend the night and get up early the next morning to apply at the consulate. We were at the consulate office before it even opened and the whole process went fairly smoothly. The hardest part was actually paying for the visas since they cannot accept ripped or torn bills. It's quite hard to get untarnished money here so we did some trading around hahaha. In the end, we can't actually get the visas until we bring plane tickets. Then we can retrieve our passports which they're holding and get our visas. The big fiasco was that nobody knew who was actually supposed to buy the tickets. Because of this, a process that could have been completed all in one day is delayed until Jan 4th because the consulate office is closed until then for the holidays. It was quite funny actually. First we were told that the tickets couldn't be bought until we had our visas...then we explained that this just wouldn't work since that put us in a bit of a catch 22...then after deciding to buy "dummy" tickets, the person in Richmond that was supposedly going to buy our tickets suddenly decided that they couldn't...it was the job of our "language director". This was interesting to hear since we don't really have a language director and the person closest to that job has a budget of $0 for us. So we had to quickly get on the phone with our logistics coordinator in Ecuador to find out who exactly was going to pay for us to get out of the country. This was all very rushed because we were trying to get the tickets the same day so we could go back to the consulate and get our visas and be done. Oh...and did I mention the consulate office is only open from 9am-1pm? So eventually it became clear that there was just no way we were going to get the tickets that day so we gave up and went home. The good news is we have visas but we just can't pick them up until we come back with our tickets. So we will return to the consulate on the 4th when they reopen and fly out the next day. All this has proved to me what I had heard...that the simplest government/bureaucratic matters are incredibly complicated overseas. Also that while we have been here we have disappeared mysteriously into the Twilight Zone or Bermuda Triangle and nobody knows what to do with us if they even happen to know we're here.

2. Last night (Tuesday, Dec 22) we showed the film "La Esperanza". Against all odds it went great. I was expecting trouble because 5 of us had been in the capital for 2 days applying for visas and so we had no time to test things or prepare. We got to the school an hour early to set up and at 7, when we were supposed to start, nobody had arrived. Not to worry...that's par for course for Latin America. So around 7:20-30 people started to pour in. We had invited all our host families and teachers and their friends and family and anyone we happened to walk by on the street that night. In all, we had about 60 people not including the 10 of us. We projected the film onto the wall outside of the school and about froze to death due to the extraordinarily cold weather that night. But we took a break halfway through for an intermission to eat chuchitos (I don't know how to describe this food) and drink ponche (basically a cider of mixed fruits with the fruit still in it). The movie went very well and people actually stayed for the whole thing and seemed to enjoy it. It clearly presented the Gospel from creation to Christ and gave a personal invitation at the end. All without out being cheesy and hokey which is quite an accomplishment based on some of the films I've seen. We don't know if any decisions were made but I suspect it gave them a lot to think about especially as they go about their celebrations the next few days.

3. Christmas here is nuts. First off they don't really get started until midnight Christmas Eve. In fact, nobody eats all day and they have dinner at 12am. Then it gets rolling with fireworks and music and food and lots and lots of booze. So between all that I don't expect to get a whole lot of sleep. The next day there will be dancing in the streets. The theme this year is pirates....and don't ask why because I don't know. But lots of people will be in the streets dancing dressed in pirate costumes. After that I will be heading to a missionaries' house in Antigua to spend the day there where it will be more quiet and hopefully grab a nap, eat American-style food, watch Christmas movies, relax, and call home. The festivities will then be over...until New Year's of course where I'm sure there's lots more craziness to come.

Prayer request update

I'm now only 4 short weeks away from finishing up language school and moving on to Ecuador. I'm hoping and praying that these last weeks will prove to bear fruit of all the work we've put in in the past 8 weeks here.

1. There is a girl named Cecilie, a Norweigian language student who has been studying with us, who is definitely seeking. I and others have had the opportunity to share testimonies, salvation, and just about every major or controversial subject in Christianity and the Bible. She still clings to the humanist European view that's very trendy these days that inspires the false hope that humanity is good at heart and can accomplish good things if you really put your mind to it. However, I think after seeing the way our beliefs are not just a tradition but a way of life for us has caused her to rethink the traditional, liturgical, forced Christianity she experienced as a child. But with only 4 weeks left there's not too much time for us to see the fruit of all our conversations. It doesn't have to happen while we're still here...but it'd be real nice to see a salvation experience before leaving.

2. Our Wednesday night Bible study has been going quite well. I haven't been in several weeks but they tell me that our national leader (the father of the host family one of the fellow missionaries here is staying with) is really stepping up and leading it. He's starting to see the possibility of the group continuing after we leave and even turning into a church. He's slowly been letting go of one Catholic tradition after another and just reading the Bible and doing what it says. Pray that this would not fall apart after we leave and that he would truly step up to the plate and accept the role of shepherd that God has clearly put him in the unique postition to fulfill. He's not 100% doctrinally sound...but I think when we reach Heaven we'll all have some corrections made too. The most important part is that he's making steady progress and has the big things right and is clearly experiencing God moving in his life.

3. The IMB has a film they produced called "La Esperanza", or "The Hope". It's mainly narrated with CGI graphics in the background, so there's no hokey, low-budget actors to interfere with the message. I'm hoping that we could show it here in our town just before Christmas. At the very least we would invite our host families and teachers and all their friends and family...at best we could promote it to the entire town and show it in the town square. I found out yesterday that we have access to a projector and screen and one of the Guatemala missionaries is gonna come up from the City to talk and see what we can do. Pray that we could get him and some of the other career missionaries behind it as it will be tough to pull off on our own. It's hard to get them out of the work they're already busy enough with and into things that must seem like them to be quite small in the scheme of things. So pray that this would all work out logistically and that many Catholics where we live would here the true Gospel that isn't preached by the Catholic church. As an ironic side not, the town square where we would show the film happens to be right in front of the Catholic church...hahaha what irony.

Thanks so much for your prayers and if I don't update this sooner then I will once I reach Ecuador!

Thanksgiving

This past weekend was the first real holiday out of the States. Although it could have been somewhat sad and lonely it turned out to be very enjoyable. All of us studying language here in Guatemala were invited to spend the holiday with the other career missionaries in a vacation house on Lago Atitlan. There were several families there so in all there were about 30 people. It was about as close to family as we could get from an ocean away. There was turkey and every kind of casserole you can think of. We played a little soccer and football in the yard and spent hours walking around the city of Panajachel where there were quite a few shops to look at. We ate dinner one night at a beautiful place that overlooked the lake. The lake itself is quite beautiful but dying. It has been one of the most popular tourist spots for years but due to extreme contamination it is now a sickly green-brown color covering most of the blue underneath. Not somewhere to go swimming. It's extremely unfortunate that this is happening to the lake, especially because so many of the locals in the area depend on tourists for their livelyhood. But despite the contamination it's still a beautiful sight.

One day we went across the lake by boat to a small pueblo called Santiago del Atitlan. The main sight there was a local god that is moved from house to house each year. Although many would claim it as a saint and it is carried during Semana Santa (Holy Week), it has pagan heritage (as does nearly everything in Latin American Catholicism). The locals call it Maximon. We visited it and it looks very much like a normal Catholic altar to a saint but with some odd twists that mark it out as having pagan origins. In fact, the Catholic side of this god/saint is Saint Simon. However, in the local dialect "ma" is an honorific prefix for a person and the "x" sound becomes "s" in spanish. Thus, Saint Simon and Maximon are the same thing. This is a perfect example of syncretism... where the Catholic church came in an forcibly converted the local mayan population but the people only converted on the surface. Actually they merged their previous pagan beliefs into the ones the Catholic church handed down to them. For that reason, Semana Santa is really a hand-me-down of the old mayan religion and the "adoration" of Saint Simon is really worship of a mayan god. Look up "maximon" on wikipedia if you want a more in-depth but simple explanation.

To end the weekend there was some excitement in a nearby town called Solola. We had to drive through this town to get to and from Panajachel, which was right on the lake. Solola is in the mountains overlooking the lake. The excitement had to do with a riot of the locals against the police and some alleged criminals. To make a long story short, there have been many killings of public bus drivers in Guatemala lately. The perpetrators have been extorting the drivers to pay a monthly "tax" and in return they won't be harmed. Some have refused to pay and have been murdered. The police had captured 3 of these people although who knows for sure it is they were actually responsible. The criminals were held in the Solola police headquarters but some people wanted more. They wanted to kill the criminals then and there. There are various stories about how it all started but some say that a mob led by a friend of a murdered bus driver started out by blocking the police caravan. What is for sure is that several police vehicles were burned and the police station gutted and burned. The alleged perps were beaten, doused with gas, and burned alive. Thankfully this didn't effect us at all. But it shows the true state of politics here underneath all the calm. The problem is that there's a general feeling among the people that the police can't be trusted and that in the past they have let the criminals go free for bribes. In this case however, people were just fed up with normal working people being killed and no one being held responsible. So once someone was caught they wanted blood. Here's a link to a short story on it with some pictures. But I'll warn you...one picture is fairly graphic. http://www.ajc.com/news/nation-world/guatemala-mob-kills-burns-216572.html

Road Trip

Last weekend most of our group here went on a three-day two-night road trip to visit some of the more famous areas of Guatemala. I'll try to give a good breakdown of the trip. We started at 4am Friday morning when we left Antigua. We ate breakfast on the way and our first real stop was Castillo San Felipe on Rio Dulce.

The castle is a fort that was built by the Spanish in an effort to stop pirate raids from the Caribbean. It reminded me a bit of Charleston, SC and Forts Sumter and Moultrie. While we were there we also got to swim in the Rio Dulce and have a picnic lunch. The next stop after that was Flores for dinner. Flores is an island in a lake in northern Guatemala. It's quite tranquil and relaxing as it has not yet developed as a tourist area as much as some of the other places we visited. We had a very nice dinner with a great view of the water.

Our final stop for the night, after about 12 hours of driving, was the hotel. The hotel was quite nice and on the water as well. There wasn't too much time to enjoy it though, as we woke up at 5am the next morning to go visit Tikal.

Tikal was at one time a capital of the Mayan civilization and is still one of the most famous ruins in the world. I won't bore everyone with the history, but there's just nothing like the view over the forest canopy from the top of a 176ft ancient temple. And because we got there so early in the morning we were able to eat a picnic breakfast there and have the park largely to ourselves. The most amazing part of the park is the sheer amount of work it must have taken to construct the complex. The temple areas themselves are on raised foundations some 20-40ft high. Imagine an artificially constructed hill that has been leveled to provide a flat area for building construction. But after all the work to create the complexes, they were nearly completely covered when the Spanish arrived. This is because the buildings were all constructed out of limestone. Limestone contains the right conditions for for plants to grow on it...and so after only hundreds of years a temple will be a rather oddly-placed mound in the middle of the jungle. So when the Spanish arrived all they could find of this amazing sight was the very tops o a few temples. There are still hundreds of unexcavated mounds today.

After leaving Tikal that morning we headed back down to the hotel for a quick swim and then lunch. The next stop was Rio Dulce with our ultimate destination being Livingston. Livingston is a bit abnormal in Guatemala in that it's about the only place with black people. It's an Afro-caribbean community with a culture and language all its own. However despite not being an island it is only accessible by boat from Rio Dulce. I've not yet found an adequate explanation of why but there are no roads that run to Livingston from the rest of Guatemala. And so to get there we took a very fast 15-person speed boat at night for about an hour. Needless to say this would not be legal in the States, but apparently they feel it is pretty safe as long as the driver has a lookout in the front with a flashlight to spot the shore or obstructions in the water.

We arrived safely at an eco-lodge with thatched roofs, mosquito nets, and barely running water. It turns out we had no need of the mostquito nets but we did have a mouse running around in the rafters all night.

Dinner was a short boat ride away in Livingston itself. We had a nice dinner and walked down to the Caribbean. The next day we took the boat to a place called 7 Altares. This is a series of natural waterfalls which in some places create pools deep enough to dive and swim in. The biggest one (and due to lack of rain the only one currently deep enough) was about 12 meters deep. After leaving there we took the boat back to collect our bags, then returned again by boat (thankfully in daylight this time), and started the drive home by van. All in all it was a great trip and extremely cheap for all the things we did. All in all it cost less than $300US for transportation, accomodation, food, and all the various activities.

Week 4

Well...I'm now one third of the way through language school. Finally starting to feel like I'm making some progress and I can talk in the past tenses without tying my brain into knots. We also had the opportunity to go to a children's daycare last Tuesday and do a Bible story and craft. I told the creation story in Spanish and then the kids colored each day of creation on a coffee filter. We're gonna do a new story, craft, and game each week so now comes the task of planning out exactly which stories to cover. This is actually quite important...because I want to give them a good overview of the whole Bible...but it's crucial that the stories target some of the Catholic tradition they're already being taught. We have an awesome opportunity to show them how the Bible directly contradicts some things they will be taught...things they're already being taught. For example...stories that show Mary as just another person used by God and not holy...stories that show the power of faith for salvation and not works...stories that emphasize our direct relationship to Jesus. I've never set out to do this before so it'll be interesting to say the least.

Hiking into Mount Doom...

I can now attest that the 3rd Lord of the Rings movie where they climb up a huge volcanoe...is completely accurate. It is every bit that exhausting and dusty and cloudy and hot. I imagine it's a bit like hiking into hell. Yesterday we climbed Volcan Pacaya which is about an hour and a half away from Antigua. We had been told to expect a steep and strenuous climb...but I didn't expect it to be that hard. Between the altitude and overpacking a bit (we were told to expect cold and rainy weather which it was not) it was the toughest hike I've ever done. To give you a point of reference...it's way steeper than the steepest points of Table Rock and stays that way pretty much all the time. There's about fifteen minutes of a two hour hike that level off somewhat. The hike starts off in the forest and on a dirt trail. But about halfway through (timewise...distance-wise it's almost at the end) the trail turns into basically gravel. It's gravel-sized pieces of dry lava rock. Imagine trying to climb straight up a mountain of gravel. It means that every step you take involves slipping a little further back at the same time. It's pretty discouraging to just see a lanscape of black and fog with no end in sight....knowing you're gonna keep slipping your way up to the top and it's gonna get harder. Because after about thiry minutes of this, the landscape turns into whole lava rock that you have to climb up. But you can't use your hands because the rocks are quite sharp and will cut you up pretty fast. This lasts another half hour until you finally reach the top. Well, technically it's not the top because at the top you can actually look inside the volcanoe. However at the top you can't see the lava...so we didn't go to the top but we got to see the lava flow from mere feet away. We roasted marshmellows and had smore's. But it was so hot that the chocolate had melted into liquid by the time we were ready. After 45 mins or so to rest we headed back down. I should mention that by the time we started heading back it was dusk...and since we were hidden in the clouds it was completely dark within 15 minutes. I had been forewarned about this so I brought a headlamp and a flashlight...however using them was much like turning on a car's bright headlights in the fog...it only makes things worse. So with the headlamp on it was possible to just illuminate your feet and a few steps ahead. That meant that the hike down the volcanoe was not so much walking as sliding down the mountain. Once we got back into the woods we were home free. So now I can mark "climbing a volcanoe" off the list of things to do before I die...and I didn't die doing it!

A fresh lava flow that opened up while we were there.

Prayer requests

So it's been about a week now since the last update and almost 2 weeks that I've been in Guatemala. Not a whole lot has been going on except getting settled and figuring out what life is gonna be like for the next couple of months. But I do have some prayer requests yall can be praying for.

1. My professor is a man named Vinicio. My language study consists of conversing with him one-on-one for 4 hours each day. We talk about a lot of things such as history, econimics, and politics...however since I am a missionary we also spend a lot of time on religious topics. We've talked about differences between the evangelical and Catholic churches (Mariology, purgatory, catechisms, etc) and a lot of other important Biblical issues. He has been Catholic his entire life but he has a son and brother who are evangelical, so he has a clear understanding of both sides. The problem is that he has spent a lot of time listening to others talk about the Bible but very little reading it for himself. He seems to intellecutally understand salvation and grace by faith and the other things that separate us from Catholicism...however it's all intellectual. Pray that in our conversations he would start reading the Truth for himself and that God would speak to him.
2. My host family are basically non-religious. They would claim Catholicism but they haven't been to mass once since I've been here and I haven't seen a Bible anywhere. When they see me reading my Bible at breakfast or during siesta or after dinner, they often ask if I'm studying for language class. They don't seem to have any understanding of reading the Bible to grow closer to the Lord and hence no sense of a relationship. We're going to try to start some sort of Bible study with and invite our host families so hopefully they will get involved. Pray that while I'm here I would have ample opportunities to share with them.
3. Studying Spanish has actually been a little frustrating. I haven't studied Spanish in this kind of way for many years. I've spent a lot of time speaking it and hearing it and so I know how it is supposed to sound...but I usually have no idea why. No I have to go back and remember the rules of grammar and syntax and reapply them. So, while I entered class at a pretty good level I feel like I've dropped down. I find myself stumbling over words and phrases because I'm thinking so much. I know I'll get past this, but since the goal is to move into the fluency of a native speaker it'll take a lot of work and a lot more than studying.
4. One of the other Journeyman here had the idea to start a Wednesday night Bible study with us and some of our host families. The goal is to also get their friends and family coming so that this can continue after we leave. Tonight was our first meeting and it went well. We took prayer requests and prayed, read a bit from the Bible (in Spanish of course), and ended with some Spanish praise songs. It wasn't much...but after seeing what God has done with our little homeless ministry in downtown Greenville...I am praying that He'll bless our efforts here similarly.

The first week...

So it's already been a week since I left home. And as usual it seems like I've been here a month. I thought things would go by slow...what with siesta and all...but there's been plenty to do and there's no sign of that letting up. In fact, there are so many activities going on that I think I'll be saying no to stuff just to have time on weekends to relax. So far, language school has been good. Class for me consists almost entirely of conversation. We talk a lot about history, politics, world events and also a lot on religions. I'm spending a lot of time trying to put my testimony and other thoughts into Spanish. It's not easy to tell someone how to be saved or tell a story from the Bible or many others things using Spanish. The past tenses of verbs are a pain and I'm not to the point yet where I can using the preterite and imperfect tenses without thinking. So between this and learning "street talk" I still have plenty to do. The hard part is to take what I'm learning in class and apply that in the real world. The reality is that people do not speak terribly clearly and I have to get used to different accents etc.

However, we've also had some free time. Most recently, we went to a popular spot that overlooks the city of Antigua. It's called "El Cerro de la Cruz", or The Hill of the Cross. It's quite a hike (especially at 5000ft altitude) but it was worth. Of course, it rained on the way back down so we were soaking wet. But that's the weather around here...storms come over the mountains quickly and you never know when it could pour down raining. So that's a bit about this first week here in school...

First few days...

Well…it’s been a long couple of days. I’ll start at the beginning and fill everyone in on what’s happened. I got up around 4 am Thursday morning to catch my flight at 6:30. I spent more time on the runway that actually in the air in my flight to Atlanta. Then I met up with 6 other Journeymen (and girls) who are all headed to Mexico or S. America. We all flew together into Guatemala City. It was very easy getting into the country with almost no questions asked…in fact, the hardest part was getting all our luggage together and onto the vans. Once we were loaded up we drove about 30-45 mins to Antigua. Where we live is actually just outside of Antigua in a small town of San Juan de Obispo. This is where our language school is located and where our new homes are. It’s a very quiet town and not very big at all. Once we arrived, we met some of the school staff and were introduced to our national families we are staying with. The family I’m with has a husband, wife, 3 daughters (7, 17, and 20 yrs old), and a 11 yr old son. Then we went home to eat and sleep…at least that’s what I did. Ate lunch, took a nap, ate dinner, and then went to bed at 8:30. Since we’re two hours of behind yall here and I hadn’t slept a wink the night before leaving, I was glad to sleep soundly for 10 hours straight.

Language school starts at 8:00 on the dot so I’m getting up around 6:30 in the morning. That’s early but it gives me enough time to read my Bible and pray in peace and quiet before everyone else in the house gets up at 7. Kids getting ready for school is pretty much the same around the world. And to my pleasant surprise I can get a hot shower. This, however, has to be done carefully. As I was warned, the device that heats the water and acts as the shower head is affectionately known as “the widowmaker”. No, I’m not making this up. As you might guess, it has the potential to give a rather unpleasant shock to anyone who might touch while the water is running. Not sure how dangerous it really is but I’m not planning on finding out. After breakfast I walk up a very steep hill to school. Let me emphasize that hill. It didn’t seem so bad coming down…except that it’s cobblestone and a nightmare with rolling luggage weighing 70lbs. But it’s a lot worse going up. Especially when the altitude here is comparable to Denver. So I’m usually sucking wind by the time I walk up the hill with my backpack. But hopefully I’ll acclimate in a couple of weeks and be ready for the 8300ft I’m headed for in Ecuador. Once we all arrived at school we got started. Today was very informal and not typical at all. We had some group lessons while we were given oral interviews one at a time to place us with a tutor. Then we put some vocabulary to good use by swinging at a piñata and shouting words like arriba, abajo, al izquierda, a la derecha, atras, adelante (up, down, left, right, behind you, in front of you). For me, it was fun but kind of like being back in Spanish 101 and not real challenging. But that’s why on Monday we start with our tutors at our individual levels of proficiency. So language school lasted until noon. After that we were all supposed to head to Antigua by bus to check out the public transportation and find our way around the city. However, one of the girls had been bitten by a dog the night before and needed to go to Guatemala city for possible shots. I went with her to keep her company and help interpret if needed. We took a taxi to the city and met up with two other missionaries that live in the city. It turns out that the trip wasn’t necessary as the bite didn’t actually break the skin but just bruised it. So after grabbing lunch, one of the missionaries drove us back and dropped us off in Antigua where we met up with our group. We walked around for about an hour and then took the long, bumpy bus ride back to San Juan. It’s really only about 15 minutes away by bus…but in the evening it stops every five feet for the next person to get on. Let’s just say that if anyone has issues with their personal space…don’t ride public transportation in Guatemala. However, it is very cheap…about 1.5 quetzales one way, which comes to about $0.20 in the States. After that it was time for dinner and to bed early again.

Woke up this morning around 9 and relaxed to read and pray a couple of hours. Then 4 of us met up to ride the bus into Antigua and mooch off of Pollo Campero's internet for a couple of hours. We figured that after buying lunch we could stay for a while. Tomorrow will be our first time going to a national church so that should be interesting. I still haven't found great internet in the town where I live except for the occasional wireless signal that comes and goes. So it might be a few days before I respond to e-mails and such. I'm thinking that I'll come into town on Wednesdays and the weekends. Thanks to eveyone for the prayers! Monday starts language school and I'll be spending 4 hours a day one-on-one with a tutor speaking only in Spanish...then I have several hours of homework each day...plus plenty of extracurricular activities and trying to keep up with e-mails...so it seems there's still not enough time in a day even in Latin America. Pray for opportunities here with the family I live with (I think they have knowledge of the Gospel but aren't believers), teachers at the school, taxi drivers, etc. There are opportunities abound.

Here's my desk in my room. As long as I have my workspace it's home.

Here's our classroom at the school. Nice and open and great views!

Amazing view from downtown Antigua!

That's all for now guys. It's taking forever to post just one blog with pictures so I'll probably update in a few days or so. Keep praying and thanks again!

Tomorrow never comes...

Well it sure seems like that sometimes...but this time tomorrow is coming. And tomorrow in the early hours of the morning I will be leaving Greenville, SC...home for 22 years...and won't be returning for some time. It's been great and full of memories. I'm sad to leave friends, family, and my church behind. But it's definitely time to do this. So...around lunch time tomorrow I should be in Antigua, Guatemala. I'll be there for 3 months doing language school. I'll be living with a Guatemalan family so I don't know what the internet situation will be exactly. If I have easy and cheap (or free) access to high-speed internet then contact will not change a whole lot. I have a Vonage phone that connects to the internet and has a local (864) area code. So if and when I get that up and running ya'll can feel free to call me at 864-335-9496. Of course, I'm also on Facebook and have e-mail. This blog will also get updated more frequently than in the past now that there's acutally stuff to write about and pictures to post. And on the note of new happenings...I'm no longer going to Ibarra but to Cuenca. It's a long story...but the short version is that the career missionaries I was going to serve under aren't being brought back due to the budget problems the IMB is currently experiencing. To my knowledge, there are no IMB missionaries going back to replace them. As a result, I am now going to serve in Cuenca, Ecuador. I don't expect there to be huge changes in the job description and the altitude, climate, etc is very much the same as in Ibarra. The only difference is that Cuenca is in southern Ecuador...about 4 hours south of Guayacil and probably 8 or so south of Quito. Cuenca is also the third largest city in Ecuador so that's a step up from Ibarra. So far I don't know a whole lot about the new job...so more on that when it comes. Hopefully I'll have some pictures from Guatemala to post later this week.

The end...

...all good things must come to an end. These past 8 weeks have some of the best of my entire life. I didn't think that was possible as the past year has been great and God has done so many awesome things...but He did even better once again. The hard part now is leaving. I never realized you could make so many good friends so fast. Being with the same people all day every day for 8 weeks straight has that effect though. And the hardest part is knowing that I probably won't ever see a lot of them ever again...not this side of eternity anway. And so today was commissioning...we were officially sent out...the rubber meets the road and training is over with and now we're on to the real thing. So...of to Guatemala on October 8th!

Mid-training update...

OK...so I know it's been quite a while since I last updated this thing. But there's a good reason for that...I didn't actually expect anyone to be reading it before now. Most of ya'll know I'm not a big blog/e-mail person...in fact I pretty much avoid it at all costs. But since I'm now out of touch with most of you folks back home I'll try to get better at this. I won't actually leave for the field for another month so updates until then will be sparing at best. But I promise to be much more frequent once I'm there. So as for what's been going on since I left SC...

The everyday schedule here is fairly busy. We're generally in sessions from 8am to 3pm. Sessions range from the mundane things about insurance, finances, etc to some excellent ones on evangelism tools. I've learned a lot about church planting in the New Testament model. It's amazing that the book of Acts has so much to offer to us today about planting churches. Everything we need is there for us to find. Yet for so long I've looked at it as history and the past and a purely "moral" model. But it's more than that...God gave us a model for literally every aspect of life...and he gave us more than enough on how to plant churches. We may have developed all kinds of techniques and plans and models...but when it comes right down to it we just need to go back to Scripture and see how the first churches in Acts were started.

Another highlight of the time here has been Chronological Bible Storying. I've known for some years now that a large portion of the world are oral learners. But what I didn't understand fully were the levels of literacy. Just because someone is literate does not mean that they are functionally literate. Many can read by sounding out the words but comprehension may not be there. In fact, even if they can be discipled or evangelized through literate means, that may not be the most effective...and additionally this method may not be passed on from generation to generation. Oral methods are universal. So I've recently learned the fine art of storying the Bible...picking certain stories that resonate with ceratain cultures...portraying them as accurately as possible from memory but presenting them in a culturally effective manner. This may actually be more difficult than you would first think. First, there are hundreds upon hundreds of different stories in the Bible. Although a certain core set may be fairly universal, others must be hand chosen to address specific cultural issues. For example, many people I will meet will have a Roman Catholic background mixed with traditional animistic beliefs. So...stories that illustrate Jesus' power over evil spirits...stories that emphasize salvation by faith and not through sacraments/works...you get the idea. This method ensures that the nationals do not become dependent on the missionary. That is one of the most damaging issues missionaries face. A church planting movement will never explode if it remains under the control of the missionary. It has to move beyond his control and into the hands of the nationals. As Westerners we feel we have to train all the nationals and ensure they have sound doctrine, etc...but that's not quite what the Bible says. It says that we are to show them "how to obey all that the Lord has commanded them." Anything beyond that is the job of the God though the Holy Spirit. But it's so hard for us to take our hands off things isn't it? If we follow Paul's example in the New Testament, he discipled the new believers for a time but then moved on as soon as possible. He would pass back through to encourage them, address sin, or counter false teaching but he stayed out of the picture as much as he conceivably could. Paul also was careful not to baptise the new believers if he could possibly avoid it. He knew that baptizing them himself would cause all kinds of problems in the future. In fact, a dispute erupted in one of his church plants over who had baptized the believers...Paul or Apollos. He wrote how thankful he was that he had only baptized as few of them himself as he did. He knew that baptizing them would cause divisions in the church...believers baptized by missionary often feel they receive a "superior" baptism. It also creates the impression that only the missionary has the authority to baptize. I could go on and on about how bad an idea it is...but I think we would all agree that Paul was one of, if not the greatest, missionary to ever live (not to mention that God thought his model good enough to make it in the Bible). Should we not then follow his example as closely as possible?

So that's a little of the many things I've been learning up here...more updates to come.

"And shall I pray Thee change Thy will?"

"And shall I pray Thee change Thy will, my Father,
Until it be according unto mine?
But no, Lord, no; that never shall be, rather
I pray Thee, blend my human will with Thine.

I pray Thee hush the hurrying, eager longing,
I pray Thee, soothe the pangs of keen desire,
See in my quiet places wishes thronging --
Forbid them, Lord, purge, though it be with fire.

And work in me to will and do Thy pleasure,
Let all within me, peaceful, reconciled,
Tarry content my Wellbeloved's leisure
At last, at last, even as a weened child."

This was written by Nathan Brown, a missionary to Burma in the 1800's. I found it while reading through "Shadow of the Almighty". It was a common prayer from Jim and Elisabeth during their uncertain times before leaving for Ecuador. So much uncertainty, doubt, longing, desire, and on, and on, and on. Lord, that the prayer will be true for my life just as you were so obviously faithful to it in the Elliot's.

"Have I an object, Lord, below?"

"Have I an object, Lord, below
Which would divide my heart with Thee?
Which would divert its even flow
In answer to Thy constancy
O teach me quickly to return,
And cause my heart afresh to burn.

Have I a hope, however dear,
Which would defer Thy coming, Lord--
Which would detain my spirit here
Where naught can lasting joy afford?
From it, my Savior, set me free
To look and long and wait for Thee.

Be thou the object bright and fair
To fill and satisfy the heart,
My hope to meet Thee in the air,
And nevermore from Thee to part;
That I may undistracted be
To follow, serve, and wait for Thee."
--G.W. Frazer

Reading this old hymn this morning makes me realize, yet again, how very distacted and divided I am in my devotion to the Lord. Even more so as I read of Jim Elliot's life in "Shadow Of The Almighty". That man was utterly devoted to the Lord. He had a singleness of mind that I want just a piece of. Comparing my life to his (not that it is necessarily the apogee of the Christian life, but certainly an excellent model to strive for) I find some similarities, some areas where I know I have eliminated distractions from the Lord. But there are so many more areas that must still be trimmed down so that I may devote more and more of myself to Him. How to do this I am still not exactly sure. There is no recipe or easy way to go about it. Everything that is in my life now is important to me in some way or another. But I'm finding that it's a matter of HOW important these things are to me. I love music. I spend quite a bit of time listening to it and looking for more of it. And music has served a purpose. It has spoken to me time and again. And God has spoken to me through it. But more and more I feel that it is now a distraction. And the same for reading history. I love history. I love to learn about it and understand the flow of it and how it has shaped people and events and places. But the time for making it a priority in my life has passed. While I was in school it was necessary; now it is another distraction from time in prayer or the Word. But paring these things down will be difficult. I've spent years and years making them a priority and it won't be easy to reverse this process. But the Lord is showing me that He has other things that I need to be doing to prepare for the future. Jim Elliot's example here is particularly wonderful. I have a Spanish Bible that I need to be reading much more frequently than I am. How much greater could my impact in Ecuador be if I know all my favorite Sciptures in Spanish? As of now I have only memorized a 2 pitiful verses, John 3:16 and Romans 3:23. Elliot was studying Greek and Spanish and indigenous Indian languages years before he ever left for the misison field. And it served him very well once he got there. I could go on and on about this because there are just so many things that need to change in my life, but sitting here discussing the issue is not changing it. It's time to get serious and disciplined and cut all the flab in my life. God has given me the unbelievable privelige of going to another country to serve has His witness; I have done absolutely nothing to deserve this, so how can I do any less than be prepared for the job?

VIII: Styx

"Sunlight is drowning in the halflight
As the feelings return
Stange and familiar, a nocturnal fear
Appearing and disappearing

There is a river running deep
And it is floating through the veins
A nameless dread of the unknown
Temporary sight, an apprehension
Vague yet saddening

Black angels guiding me
The sum of all my fears
Black angels owning me
Whispering through me

Last night I heard the waters dreaming
Stones were fast asleep along the riverbed

Let the waters wash all over me and let me dream again
Of something good

Let me dream of sheltered places, of precious moments
And of long-lost faces, of truthful words that finally do make some sense

Lay out these maps before me
Let me trace again the borderlines of land and sea

Flood the tidepools and wash away the shores
No longer at the mercy of the waves, just let me breathe again

Let me stand and bathe in the healing light
And one more time let me navigate, just let me navigate by the stars

Roads and rivers are winding in a circle
Around the same old headstrong me
Outside looking in time and again
Feeling the heat of a recurring dream"

Wow...so this is one of my favorite songs ever. This song absolutely speaks to me and to who I am. Sometimes I have such a hard time overanalyzing things. I spend way too much time trying to analyze the future and figure out what it gonna happen when I just need to trust God. Just like in the song, I feel that "nameless dread of the unknown". But He has a plan. Instead of letting all the worries beat againt me like the waves in the ocean, I just need to stand up above them and trust God. In the terms of the lyricist, "just let me navigate by the stars". It's all in His hands.

VII: Lighthouse

"And where will we be tomorrow
If we do not leave today?

The more we wait for things to change
The more they stay the same
And the more they stay the same
We change

With all the floodgates opened
Walls of water at our heels
Where do we go from here?
Where will we turn to?
With all the shouldered load
With all the limitless possibilities

Like birds of passage flying free
Aimlessly soaring
Between time and space, sorrow and joy

Through the night and undergrowth
We set out for the sea
Peering, absorbing, consuming
And nothing's ever good enough

No river too wide
No ocean too deep
No mountain too high
The myriads of open roads

Wayfarers at the crossroads
There's always more than this, never more than this
Eyes elude the landmarks
And the flame is swallowed now

No river too wide
No ocean too deep
No mountain too high
The myriads of open roads

Every river too owide
Every ocean too deep
Every mountain too high
The myriads of open roads"

VI: To The Ones Who Have Failed

"Somehwere in a city, somewhere in a room
A silent man, a work undone, a plan that went astray
Somewhere in the lifetime of a yearning reverie
Words have lost their meaning on the fragile stage of time

The sky is starless for the ones who have failed
Going nowhere, nowhere to go
Life has no kindness to the ones who have failed
Go somewhere, anywhere but home

Sky without stars
Stars without sky
Sky without stars
Stars without sky

Somewhere in a wasteland, on a windy railway bridge
A desperate girl is looking down on all she'll leave behind
Somewhere in a subway, a vacant name, an unknown face
Another everyday disgrace in the roundabouts of life

The sky is starless for the ones who have failed
Going nowhere, nowhere to go
Life has no kindness for the ones who have failed
Going somewhere, anywhere but home"

Well, this song just happened to be the next one in order on the album I've been posting, but it sure came along at just the right time. Yesterday was Sunday and this song really made me think some more about the sermon that was preached. One of the things that really convicted me in the sermon was about how we, as Christians, have to actually slow down, reach out, and personally show kindness and love to people before we have much chance of sharing the Gospel with them. And one of the first things that came to my mind was homeless people. And this song seems to reinforce that. What really breaks my heart is that I want to be able to do a lot more for these people who have such great need. But I feel like my life is just soooo busy that I can't hardly break away to do it. A couple weeks or so ago, me and a friend of mine went downtown and bought some homeless people dinner and just sat outside and talked and hung out with them for a about an hour. It was one of the most meaningful times and it's something I want to do more often. But I find myself not slowing down enough to do it. But I have to. If not for homeless people then for just the people who are around me every day everywhere I go. I have to slow down enough to show them the kindness and love of Christ. Because the song is right, there really is no kindness in life for the ones who have failed. Or even the ones who have all the success in the world, but still have a big hole in their lives. There's just the love of Christ reaching out through ordinary people like you and me. But am I showing it?

V: Blue Wide Open

"The sky is blue wide open
A grand vision to sink into
Lonely views to stir the eyes
Moments of grace outside of the real

The sea is blue wide open
Completeness all around
One step further and the weight gives way
To all the dreams that are

Just like an echo of light
Canned in the heart of a stone
A wayward pulse beating in the stillness
Beneath the snow something's breaking through"

IV: Stigmata

"This feeling speaks
With the quiet flutes of fall
That disturb the sleep of sunken images
The memory of voices in abandoned rooms

Walk with me
Walk with me down to the river's edge
Walk with me
Where the secrets lie and wait

These wounds bleed
The solemn pride of mourning
An overwhelming pain nourishing the flame
The cold embrace of a breaking heart

Take this pain away
Don't take this pain away
Take this pain away
Don't take this pain away

Walk with me
Walk with me down to the water's edge
Walk with me
Where the mirrors lie and wait

This sadness speaks
Of golden plains and lakes of blue
Like the curse of wrathful God
Like dew dropping from a thorn
It speaks of things in secret toungues
And it is speaking out a name

Take this pain away
Don't take this pain away
Take this pain away
Don't take this pain away"

I like these lyrics so much because they remind me of myself. Sometimes as I think back on life, I want God to take away the pain, the heartache of some of the losses. I just want him to make it stop hurting. But I then I know that the pain is there for a reason. It's to make me change. And so usually I start out praying "take this pain away" but then later praying "don't take this pain away" just help me to learn from it. This also reminds me of something I read by C.S. Lewis. He said that pain is often (but not always) how God gets our attention. We can ignore pleasure and our own conscience and His small voice, but pain is His megaphone. When we hurt, we sit up and listen. So, no Lord, don't take this pain away. Show us what needs changing.

III: Unbreakable

"All around this fortress
Run the rivers of the dead
Broke what seemed to be unbreakable
Unreachable
Drowned what seemed to be impregnable
Infallible
Cold September rain, the summer's retreat
A tapestry of falling stars

This truth is small and truly trite:
There's no such thing as permanence
But losss is like an undertow
Pulling you down, pulling you down

Tonight I'm drilling holes
In the blueprint in my chart
To drain the liquid shades of grey
That run like rivers from my monument
To reach the core, to breathe again
To find the long lost words,
My credo and my curse:
We few, we happy few

When all the world turns to stone
And everything just stays the same
There's no safe harbour in our sight
All beauty sinks into the night
Still we are navigating by the stars

Because to me, because to me you were unbreakable
Because to me, because to me you were unbreakable
Nothing is, nothing was, nothing will ever be unbreakable

II: The Lonely Views of Condors

"Sometimes it's coming over me
Like a warm rain
Sometimes it's coming back to me
Like a memory
Just like the heat of endless winters
The cold of midday sun
It's the longest way a man can go
Sometimes it's more than I can take

Last night I spread my wings
Upon two worlds colliding
And somewhere in the monstrous distance
The world, it came down on me

Now I'm soaring on lost latitudes
A navigator with no chart
Looking down on all the colours that
Separate day from night

A world was lost the other day
And I'm choking on the sediment
And all the things that could have, would have been
Are the things that will not let me grow

Drifting through the bitter echoes
And the stillness far and wide
All alone with nameless phantoms
Chasing down a lonely road

Sometimes it's coming over me
Like a warm rain
Sometimes it's coming back to me
Like it's all destiny
And here I am
So close, and yet so far away from you
And here I stand
Lost in the echoes of goodbyes"

I: The Weight

"The view from here, it is so frightening
A world of tide pools, incompleteness all around

Roads and rivers are winding in a circle
Around a curled up monumental me
Oustide looking in, time and again
Feeling the weight of a jaded dream

And the view from here is frightening

Everything is so different now
The moon looks down with orphaned eyes
And the lighthouse sends out fragile signals
To a distant desert sea

Roads and rivers are winding in a circle
Around a curled up monumental dream
Outside looking in, time and again
Feeling the weight of a jaded me"

Hmmmm. I can certainly identify. Sometimes as I try to think ahead to the future and what's in store I can't help but think that the view from here is oh so frightening. Sometimes it feels like I'm lost at sea with only a distant lighthouse guiding me in. And when I start to think about things in terms of me, and what how it all affects my life, that's when I run into trouble. I gotta constantly put it in perspective and realize it ISN"T about me. I'm just one small piece in a very big world that God has under complete control. The view from here is frightening to me and I do feel an incompleteness all around, but God. He knows the future and controls it! What joy to let that burden go!

The Art of Navigating By The Stars

You ever get a phone call or letter (or e-mail in my case) that just makes you sit back and go "whaaat?". I did last night. It's taken me quite a while to get used to the reality that in less than three months I will be away from my home, my family, my friends, and everything I've ever known; two months after that I will be even futher away in another country. I know I can be rather cynical and sarcastic and rough around the edges, especially to my close friends; I suppose it may seem from the outside that these things aren't affecting me. But despite the way I may come across, those who know me well would attest that this has been far from an easy adjustment. There have been plenty of times that I've found myself thinking that I must be dreaming, that some other person is doing this, I have to be crazy. The ONLY thing that reassures me is the peace of God that this is His will. This has been a very slow process of me giving up control of my life to the Lord. And, of course, just as I've started to feel comfortable with things -- God has to throw it up in the air again. I had just started to get a feel for where I'll be going (Ambato, Ecuador) and what I'll be doing (volunteer coordinator), and He changes things. Now, it's to be Ibarra, Ecuador and doing church planting (or something like that, not really sure yet). True there's really not much difference in the what and the where, and I always knew changes were likely to come. But I guess psychologically I had started to get comfortable and at ease and, somewhere along the way, I think I stopped relying on God completely. I mean, hey, I already speak Spanish. My church trip in June is practically next door to Ambato. Even the job was something I felt at ease with. So going to Ambato wasn't going to be too hard as far as things go. But that's just the point isn't it? I wasn't trusting God. I was trusting me. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I've been holding on to mirages and they've dissolved in my hand. So the Lord stepped in and forced me to stop and take a few steps back --

I can't do this on my own. It's still overwhelming. It's gotten easier I suppose, but only because the shock of it all has gotten numbing not because I'm dealing with it any better. I still sometimes feel like I'm looking at my life from the outside looking in. This is still pushing me waaay past anything remotely resembling a comfort zone. That's reality. That's what's real. And while I'm certainly excited and sure that this is the right path, a facade of confidence and ease is just that -- a facade. And trusting God is the only thing that will get me through to the end.

On a final note, I think the next several posts will be on lyrics from the album The Art Of Navigating By The Stars, by Sieges Even. I don't listen to a lot of music that I would describe as cerebral and beautiful and profound. This is. And the lyrics have really been speaking to me over the last couple of years. So more on that to come...

"The Fullness Of Time"

"It's all become so clear
And I have learned the
Truth behind the lies and seen the lies within the truth
Everythng in context finally makes sense
I see the paths I walked
Some I paved myself
Some where I went gladly
Some against my will...

Now I know the reason for the suffering
I'm a better person for having known the pain
A better person having overcome the pain"

Some lyrics from the song "The Fullness of Time" by Redemption. Very simple words, but very profound and very true. I won't say that everything in my past makes sense now, but a whole lot more does now than then. And some things that hurt real bad have been put in context and I can see that ultimately they were good for me. Sometimes I just won't change until it hurts. Others...I still don't understand...but I know it's in God's hands. And on some level I think everyone can identify...seems like some things only start to become clear in the fullness of time...God's time.

"How He Loves"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Chx6s3qXKt4

I think this is my favorite praise song ever. Watching this video from the guy who wrote it makes it that much more meaningful. Hope it inspires your day too!

Mirages

As I'm sitting here typing up a paper I'm listening to a band called To-mera. No, you've never heard them or even heard of them. No, you probably won't like them because it's very avant-garde progressive metal. I like them because they mix a kind of dark noire jazz atmosphere in with the metal. But what caught me this morning was their lyrics to the song "Mirage"

"Hush now, the morning's near
Her crystal light will wash away all your fear
Your teary eyes she'll blind with hope
She'll make you believe there's meaning to reveal
Make you believe yesterday couldn't be real

So wipe your eyes now and be brave
Let this false hope lead your way
This frail mirage might just warm your frozen heart
Brace yourself
There really is nobody out there to hold your hand - when you are ready to fail

Darling hush now, the night is near
To bury your pain in darkness and fear
And on the dusty roads we ride with nothing but our foolish pride
Trying to find the way forward
Desperately searching for who we really are

So close your eyes now and be brave
Let those dreams stand in your way
Their frail mirage might just warm your frozen heart
If it's all for the happy days
Don't turn around, don't look ahead for meaning
You will have to face the demons you've erased"

Ok so I don't agree with all the lyricist has to say, but it certainly made me stop and think. I think back on my own life and I can't help but agree with a few things. I think it is good to have hopes and dreams and desires for the future. I think we were made to want this and we need to have these things in our lives. But I also think we often stray from God here. I see so many people lurching from one broken hope to the next, one shattered dream to the next. And I've been there. We pick ourselves up after the fall and take encouragement that the future will be better. But wil it? Maybe I'm just cynical and nobody wants to hear it, but the truth is that the future won't necessarily be any better. Because so often we're not following what God has for our lives. When we're dependent on fulfilling our own hopes and dreams and not God's, we're left holding a mirage. Sure it may make us feel better to look ahead to a bright future where everything works out the way we dream it will. But how many times does that happen? It's just a mirage. It's empty. And it may not be fun to realize that now, but I for one would rather stare reality in the face than keep holding onto something that isn't real. Of course, this all sounds pretty hopeless and depressing isn't it? But it's not. Because there's something better than our own hopes and dreams. There's what God has for us. He has something better and more glorious and more fulfilling. And it's something that he has had for us since the dawn of time. Since before we were even born. It will incorporate your own hopes and dreams but in His own perfect plan. And I think that's more exciting than my own feeble efforts at life. I've held onto plenty of mirages until at last they dissolved and I was left with the cold, hard truth that they were never there to begin with. I'm tired of that. So over the past several years I've started down God's plan for my life. And boy is it better than anything I ever dreamed of. But before you let go of your mirages, do as Jesus suggests and count the cost. Because following Him will be costly. It will be hard. It will require sacrifice. On some level you may have to give up friends and family. So count the cost and be sure you are ready to make the sacrifices that He WILL ask of you. But in return He gives you a fulfilling life. Life and life to the full. To me that is so much better than my old life of clinging to vain hopes and dreams only to find that they are mirages that let me down. Are you riding down a "dusty road" in your life clinging to your "foolish pride"? If so, let go of the mirages that are your own plans and trade them for the real thing.

"Can't Stop The Dreaming"

Lyrics and music by Rhys Marsh

"Can't stop the dreaming, fuelled by desire
The ever unknowing, can't stop the dreams

Lights go out - I fall into the black
I will doubt all I've ever known

Can't stop the dreaming, lit by desire
The questions unknowing, can't stop the dreams

Lights go out - I fall into the black
I will doubt all I've ever known

And if this night stops, will I become what I've seen?

The future's coming, the past's returning
And I'm here, in the middle of the strangest place..."

I really like those last two lines. So appropriate for my life now. The future's coming; I know I can't stop it; in fact, I don't want to stop it. But right now I'm just in the strangest place...and it sure is hard to deal with sometimes.

First post

Ok. I finally gave in. As anyone who knows me will attest, I hate technology. I hate cell phones...and normal phones for that matter. I have NEVER had an meaningful conversation over the phone. And I especially hate texting. Blogging is somewhere not too far down on my blacklist of modern technological innovations that are slowly destroying personal communication in the world. My first step into this was a cell phone only four years ago...then a myspace...and of course that was old hat before too long...so a facebook shortly thereafter. And I've finally given in to blogging as well. Life was so much cleaner and simpler without all this stuff. I would much rather sit down and have a real, genuine, intimate conversation with my good friends than post my thoughts here on some blog that's out in the nebulous cyber world. And I know I'm old-fashioned...people think I'm crazy to write with a fountain pen and wear a hand-wound mechanical watch...but there's something comfortingly personal about these things. There's a warmth to these things much like sitting down with people and having a real conversation. But I do live in the 21st century...and technology appears to be destroying the past and my old-fashioned ways...so here I go...yet another step. So why am I doing this anyway? Because after July 27 I'll be in Richmond, Virginia for training to be a missionary in Ecuador. And then I'll be in Ecuador for two years. And for all that time I'll be out of personal communication. So I want to keep everyone filled in on what's going on in my life and this seems to be the best way now that even e-mail is considered old. I'll try to have something somewhat important or at least interesting to say...mainly spiritual stuff but I'm sure there'll be plenty of rants like tonight's. Oh, and sorry to disappoint but I have nothing profound or spiritual to say on this first post...just my rant on how technology is the bane of existence. Maybe I'll have something profound next time...